Post Mormon Peace

In this episode, Chad describes the heartbreak and uncertainty of navigating a mixed-orientation marriage, divorce, single parenthood, and an entirely new relationship with the person who had been his closest companion. He also shares how he and Sierra eventually built a strong friendship and co-parenting partnership on the other side.
 
This is a conversation about accepting someone for who they are, finding stability when life comes apart, and allowing love to change shape instead of turning it into resentment.
 
Content Warning: This episode contains some strong language and candid discussion of past drug use, divorce, sexuality, and other mature themes. Listener discretion is advised.
 
 

In this solo episode, Derek reflects on what peace has started to look like several years after leaving the LDS Church.
After moving back to Utah and finding himself surrounded by Mormon culture again, he noticed something changing. Instead of only seeing the parts of the Church he disagrees with, he’s becoming more willing to recognize what he still appreciates about it.
That shift raises some bigger questions: What does religion provide that may be difficult to recreate outside of it? How do we pass values on to our children without requiring them to share our worldview? And can we become secure enough in our own beliefs that we no longer need the people around us to agree with us?
Derek explores self-acceptance, uncertainty, raising kids after a faith transition, learning from criticism, and the freedom that can come from admitting, “I don’t know.”
Maybe peace isn’t finally having all the answers. Maybe it’s becoming comfortable enough with ourselves to remain open to people, ideas, and even the possibility that we might change our minds.

Why do people really leave the LDS Church—and how well do believing members understand their reasons?
In this episode of Post-Mormon Peace, Derek Williams and Jordan Smith discuss Torn: Why People We Love Are Leaving the Church and What We Can Learn from Them by Jeff Strong.
Drawing on thousands of survey responses and interviews, Torn explores the growing number of people disengaging from the Church and, perhaps more importantly, the disconnect between why believing members think people leave and the reasons former members actually give.
Derek and Jordan dig into some of the book’s most interesting findings, including the role of church history and truth claims, moral and social disagreements, difficult church experiences, and the surprisingly small percentage of people who say they left simply because they wanted a different lifestyle.
But the conversation goes beyond the statistics.
How do you maintain a meaningful relationship when someone you love sees the Church completely differently than you do? Can believing members genuinely accept someone’s decision to leave while still hoping they return? And can former members extend that same curiosity and empathy toward those who continue to believe?
Derek and Jordan also discuss what Torn gets right, where they think it falls short, and why learning to listen without trying to persuade may be one of the most important skills for both believing and post-Mormon families.
Plus, they share some exciting news: Torn author Jeff Strong will be joining Post-Mormon Peace for an upcoming episode.
Whether you're an active member, former member, somewhere in between, or trying to understand someone you love, this conversation is ultimately about something bigger than deciding who is right: learning how to understand each other and protect the relationships that matter most.

In this episode of Post Mormon Peace, we explore what it really means to meet in the middle when beliefs, identities, and experiences diverge. Rather than arguing to be right or trying to change someone’s mind, we talk about how curiosity, empathy, and genuine listening create bridges across ideological and religious divides. We share a personal story about navigating a political disagreement with a close friend — not by debating, but by asking questions to understand his why.
This conversation challenges the idea that people leaving a faith tradition need to remain quiet, neutral, or distant to maintain peace. Instead, we discuss how connection and mutual respect can thrive even when beliefs have changed. Whether you’re navigating family relationships, friendships, or community spaces, this episode offers practical tools for staying grounded, communicating with compassion, and recognizing shared humanity across differences.
Keywords: post-mormon, faith transition, religious differences, communication, empathy, curiosity, bridge-building, relationships, understanding.

From the outside, it can look like I’ve built a perfectly peaceful life of open conversations and harmony. The truth? Choosing openness often means choosing discomfort. In this episode, I talk about what peace actually looks like in practice—the messy parts, the triggers, and the moments I’d rather keep my mouth shut.
I share recent stories with a sibling, my dad, a close friend, my wife, and a raw moment with my mom where I snapped, then called back to apologize. You’ll hear how I’m learning to zoom out (think S&P 500 growth curve) and keep “coming back to the table”—again and again. Peace isn’t the absence of conflict; it’s a commitment to connection, repair, and telling the truth with love.
If you’ve ever stayed silent too long, lost your cool, or said something you regret, this one’s for you.
Highlights / Takeaways
Peace is an internal practice, not a perfect outcome.
Triggers happen; repair is what keeps relationships growing.
“Coming back to the table” > “winning” the conversation.
Zoom out: judge growth over years, not days.
Apologizing doesn’t erase convictions—it deepens connection.
Gentle Note
This episode includes candid reflections on LDS culture/leadership from my current perspective. If you’re a believing member and that feels tender right now, feel free to skip—or listen with curiosity and care.
Call to Action
Got a story to share? I’d love to hear from you or have you on the show: postmormonpeace@gmail.com

In this heartfelt follow-up episode, Derek sits down once again with his teenage daughter, Ashlyn, for an open conversation about how parenting in their family has evolved—especially since leaving the Mormon church.
They explore the transformation from a model of correction and control to one centered on love, trust, open communication, and emotional freedom. Derek shares insights from working with coach Steve Hardison and discusses how one powerful shift in focus—“my sole and primary purpose as a parent is to love and accept my children”—has changed everything.
Ashlyn brings her honest, thoughtful perspective as she reflects on what it’s like being parented in this environment of emotional safety. From decision-making and self-criticism to arguments with siblings and the importance of feeling heard, Ashlyn offers a wise and articulate voice of her own growth and the strength of their evolving family dynamic.

In this special episode, Derek invites his 14-year-old daughter Ashlyn onto the podcast for a vulnerable and illuminating conversation about what it was like to grow up in the LDS Church and then face the family’s transition out of it.
Ashlyn offers her personal reflections on what the church meant to her, how she experienced the family's decision to leave, and how her worldview has shifted since. With impressive depth and emotional honesty, she opens up about feelings of shock, confusion, sadness, betrayal, and ultimately growth—providing rare insight into how a thoughtful teen navigates a major faith transition.
This episode is a must-listen for any post-Mormon parent trying to understand what it’s like for kids to process religious change, and how to better support them through it.

In this introspective and candid episode, Jordan takes the interviewer seat to explore Derek’s journey in launching the Post-Mormon Peace podcast. The discussion uncovers the emotional and logistical challenges of speaking publicly about leaving Mormonism, especially after moving back into Utah County with young children. Derek shares his motivations, inner fears, and the mindset shifts that helped him push forward.
Together, they delve deep into topics like acceptance, navigating relationships post-faith transition, the importance of self-love, and fostering meaningful dialogue with those who remain in the church. The episode stands as both a personal reflection and a practical guide for others navigating similar journeys.
Email: postmormonpeace@gmail.com with topic suggestions or guest recommendations.
Share the podcast with friends or family members you’d like to engage in deeper conversations with.

What happens when the life you've built around your faith begins to crack — and you're no longer sure if you believe?
In this powerful and heartfelt conversation, Derek reconnects with Blake Lawler, a fellow former missionary and dentist, who opens up about his journey navigating a crisis of faith within a devoted LDS family. Blake shares how one quiet moment of research unraveled deeply held beliefs, the emotional toll of carrying doubts in silence, and the complexities of being a father and husband when your beliefs no longer align with your family's.
This episode explores:
The emotional weight of doubting in silence
How to support a believing spouse while deconstructing
Raising children with integrity and openness
Finding peace, purpose, and growth beyond belief
Whether you're questioning, believing, or somewhere in between, Blake's honesty will leave you feeling seen, inspired, and less alone.
Reach out to Blake at blake.lawlor@gmail.com
👉 Follow and share your thoughts:
Instagram: @postmormonpeace
Facebook: Post Mormon Peace Podcast
Email: postmormonpeace@gmail.com

This might be one of the most important conversations we’ve had on the podcast. I interview my wife, Jenny, as she tells her story—what it was like growing up in a faith she loved, how she handled my early doubts, and what eventually led to her own deconstruction. Her story is full of grace, struggle, and transformation. Whether you’re in the middle of your own faith shift or just want to better understand a loved one, this conversation is for you.
Reach out to Jenny at jennymwilliams1@gmail.com
Reach out to us at postmormonpeace@gmail.com